Health Sex Sexual problems and solutions Messy sex and douching Anal sex can get a little messy. It's perfectly natural and it has probably happened to all of us one time or another, but there are a few ways that you can potentially avoid a mess. DouchingWhen using a small bulb douche, it's recommend that you use plain, clean water, preferably at body temperature. However, douching (even just with water) can irritate the lining of the arse, making it more vulnerable to infections. You do not need antiseptics, disinfectants or anything else in a douche, as they can all irritate the lining even more. Although, it is not recommended to use douches that attach to the shower (or unscrewing the shower head and using the shower hose), many men do so anyway. If you do this, it's important to keep in mind that there's variable water pressure and heat coming out of the shower and that you will not always be able to control the amount of water that goes in. When douching, it often takes some time to expel all the water. If you are planning on having sex, make sure you douche at least an hour or so before as you may need to return to the toilet several times to get all the water out. If an accident does happen during sex, don't freak out - it's natural. Just go to the bathroom and clean up. Sometimes, it can be an embarrassing experience which can kill the mood, so try making a joke about it and if you are the top, try to show some understanding. Wearing a condomWearing a condom is not only done to prevent STIs and HIV. Some men also use condoms for hygiene purposes. If you feel that your bowels are not completely empty but you still want to have sex, getting your partner to wear a condom will help him avoid any mess. If an accident does occur, he can simply remove the condom and throw it away. Douching and HIV/STIsIf you are going to engage in douching then you need to know that this can increase the chances of HIV and STIs being transmitted, this is because the anal passage needs mucus to stop tears and cuts happening. If you take that away then it will increase the chances of HIV and STIs being transmitted. If you are going to engage in douching and anal sex we recommend using condoms. If you don’t want to use condoms and are HIV-negative then we recommend you look into PrEP. BACK TO SEX PROBLEMS AND SOLUTIONS Find out more about Prep HOW RISKY IS...? References Read more 1 Carballo-Dieguez A, Bauermeister JA, Ventuneac A, Dolezal C, Balan I, Remien RH. The use of rectal douches among HIV-uninfected and infected men who have unprotected receptive anal intercourse: implications for rectal microbicides. AIDS and Behavior, 2008;12(6):860-866.